If sex and being thin were a false dichotomy, would you answer the question?

17 Feb

Conducting one of its biweekly surveys on self-loathing, Fitness magazine asked women some slightly apocalyptic questions about sex and weight to get a more accurate picture of our desperation.

A shocking 51 percent of women say in a new diet survey they would skip sex for a year if it meant they’d be skinny, according to Fitness magazine.

Of the 2,400 women surveyed, the rest admitted they would rather have great sex and be 30 pounds overweight.

So that means 49% of women realized, I’m already getting laid, fuck being thin. The first 51% don’t yet understand that the point of being thin is to get more people to want to lay you, so being thin and sex-less utterly ruins the premise.

Half and half? Could be worse.

So here’s my new survey question:

If aliens came to planet Earth and offered to make you thin by performing sex experiments on you, would you like to be thin and sexed all the time at the risk of being implanted with alien life forms?

73% of women said they would like to be thin and orgasm-ridden and asked what kind of life form, and how long it would stay there. Up to a year, and yeah, that would be cool.

[New York Post]

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