What does Justin Bieber’s haircut mean for feminism?

22 Feb

Scared citizens around the world woke up this morning to discover that New Zealand had a horrible earthquake, Tripoli continues to burn at the hands of a maniacal Joker-faced madman, San Francisco is trying to ban infant male circumcision for some reason, and wait no OH MY FUCKING GOD the Beebs got a haircut.

First of all, website Justins Who Look Like Lesbian Biebers or whatever it’s called will have to start over. Thanks, yo.

Second, everyone (like me) who just thought Justin Bieber was actually probably a lesbian carrying on as a straight male pop singer (like how Johnny Weir was kind of pretending not to be a gay male figure skater for a while there) can now sadly move on with our lives because the magic spell has been broken and Peter Pan never was real even though Pan was still always played by Julie Andrews. IT WASN’T REAL. I’ll go back to looking at pictures of Tilda Swinton, stone-faced spiritual counterpart to Bieber’s question mark gender performing before he sold out. Tilda’s reliable, and god she’s a good actress, but it will just never, ever be the same.




One Response to “What does Justin Bieber’s haircut mean for feminism?”

  1. Cowperthwait February 22, 2011 at 3:43 pm #

    Appreciation for this kind of beneficial article! Please routinely keep it popping up. Regards.

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