Actual study: Men “apprehensive” of women’s products

4 May

Australian researchers have discovered something kind of weird: scented body wash freaks out dudes. Not peach scrub exfoliating body wash itself, but just its proximity in shopping centers.

“Research found that men made more purchases and had a positive association with health products that were not placed in high traffic areas or next to feminine-inspired products,” he said.

“This is based on the idea that men are apprehensive of women’s products and are therefore less likely to spend time perusing their own personal needs.”

Oh right, pink packaging is one of those “contagious gay” things, which automatically makes guys “apprehensive.” It’s almost as bad as being hit on by a gay guy. Stay away! I’m going to fuck you up! And then suddenly there’s a “cleanup in aisle four” voice on the loudspeaker and old Melanie finds some guy laying on the floor choked on his own vomit under a pile of tampons/butt plugs/same thing, really.

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