Tag Archives: Berlusconi

Berlusconi cares too much, is the real lesson here.

15 Feb

God has a sense of humor today. Berlusconi is going to trial! This time not for tax fraud, bribery, embezzlement, false accounting, bribing a judge or corruption, but for the simple stupid crime of sleeping with an underage prostitute and then helping her avoid theft charges.

Berlusconi, like many powerful men with money who don’t seriously believe they are subject to the law, is confused about why this is even an issue, because this has somehow become a referendum on how Italy treats women rather than how Berlusconi is a pathetic lawbreaker with some serious self-esteem issues.

Berlusconi has made no secret of his admiration for beautiful women and made no apologies for it. But he said, in response to Sunday’s demonstration, that he has always valued female workers in his companies and sought to promote their hard work.

Yes, he has worked very hard to promote women, FP recalls.

Among party candidates for regional assemblies and the European Parliament were pretty younger women, often ex-showgirls, appointed by Berlusconi.

Honestly, what is it that you women want? Berlusconi makes you feel special, and you get angry? Women are so hard to understand.

The actual sad takeaway from the AP article is that he faces higher penalties for getting a child prostitute out of trouble with the police rather than for actually participating in child prostitution. If only he had just managed to fuck her and forget about her, this would probably go away a lot more easily. Let that be the real lesson to you, Silvio.

Berlusconi can’t see why all women are mad, because all women are special

14 Feb

Because it is Valentine’s Day, and because hundreds of thousands of Italian women are pissed for some lame reason that their prime minister is a global wax-faced embarrassment, Silvio Berlusconi has the following to say about his gentlemanly perspective on women:

“I have always made it so that every woman feels, how should I say, special.”

Whoops! Sorry, dude, your douchey math is reflective of the pathetic state of your country’s economy. “All,” “every” ≠ “special,” “exceptional.”

The late standup comic Bill Hicks’s math equation for love is more to the point for someone with half a nut worth of honesty: “It’s hard to have a relationship in this business, man, you’re always traveling and keeping weird hours, you know. It’s going to take a very special woman. Or, a bunch of average ones.”

Happy Valentine’s Day!