Tag Archives: Planned Parenthood

Sanity and hypocrisy: Planned Parenthood Indiana funding

16 May

Since most of the insane, cruel people in this country are either politicians or people who lobby politicians for legislation that negatively and needlessly impacts their fellow human beings for no particular reason whatsoever except “Jesus wanted it that way for poor people,” it’s not surprising to hear that sane and compassionate ordinary citizens from 36 states across the country have put up donations to Planned Parenthood Indiana to allow it to serve Medicaid patients for another week. Unlike Gov. Mitch Daniels and his “he’s the least horrible option” possible GOP presidential bid, some Americans would not like to see thousands of Indiana women denied preventive medical care.

Incidentally, did you know that the Indiana law stripping Medicaid funding from Planned Parenthood only applies to clinics? Hospitals that perform abortions will still receive Medicaid funding as normal. If the GOP were as committed as they say they are to fake “stopping abortions” by cutting off all funding to anyone at all who provides (safe, legal) abortions, then logically they’d also be required to cut Medicaid funding to hospitals that perform them as well. I imagine they sensed, however, that turning out a bunch of sick people at hospitals onto the street wouldn’t go over well when it came time to enforce the law.

A bunch of women, on the other hand…



Other links: Donate to PP of Indiana

Gov. Daniels signs law offering to kill women for spot in GOP primary

11 May

A federal judge has refused to issue a temporary restraining order against the new Indiana law signed yesterday by Gov. Mitch Daniels that defunds the state’s Planned Parenthood clinics, meaning that the bill takes effect immediately. The ACLU will now seek an injunction, with a hearing set for June 6th.

From the AP story:

“Family planning dollars fund preventive health services that are critical to low-income and vulnerable women and their families,” [ACLU of Indiana Legal Director Ken] Falk said. “It is unlawful, unnecessary and cruel to deny these populations health services that they desperately need.”

Idiotically, this law that will hurt thousands of women in Indiana by decreasing access to birth control, pap smears, breast exams and STI testing is nothing more than a playing card in Daniels’s possible presidential run.

It’s 2011. Women’s health is still somehow a playing piece in the pathetic, destructive gamesmanship of our national political landscape. Health, for women. Women’s health. Women, the people who are half of everyone you know, women women women women women womOH GOD JUST NOT THE OIL SUBSIDIES.

Repeat this over and over to yourself: the GOP would like to see women dead of preventable cancer and unsafe abortions. The GOP will actually kill women to get into office. We don’t need women! We just fuck little boys in Denny’s restrooms! The GOP is the party of death. The GOP wants death for you. They want you dead, so they can grind up your bodies and sell it at discount rates to Charles Koch so he can make it into popsicles he feeds to his dogs.

Indiana comes up with least creative way yet to destroy Planned Parenthood

27 Apr

Indiana! O Indiana. They figured it out: if you can’t get the federal government to refuse to give out money to Planned Parenthood, just refuse to take it. This was so easy!

The Indiana House is expected to vote as soon as today to cut off the $3 million in federal money the state distributes to the organization for family planning and health programs. The Senate approved the measure earlier this month.

Duh! No points for difficulty here, though. Neighboring Ohio wheeled in a freaking fetus to testify. Creativity, hmmm?

Indiana, if you weren’t governed by groups of marauding hillbillies, you would have figured out how to misappropriate these funds instead of just outright turning them down. There are thousands of free jet skis and pontoon boats you just missed out on. Now you will just have to settle for dragging the corpses of the poor women you kill behind your lame ’98 four-wheelers instead. But the lakes just thawed!

You were supposed to build some private “clinics” where some of those unemployed anti-choice goblins could shoot stale Republican semen into hoo-has with Super Soakers and give out birth control packs filled with Skittles, then direct the money over there in the form of state contracts. Everyone on the clinic board gets a free jet ski! Now that would have made sense. You guys learned fucking nothing from the Iraq War.

Nearly half of Americans finally realize the GOP is full of lunatics

12 Apr

Hey, I wonder how the GOP strategy of “kill women and poors” is working out for them lately? It’s the kind of strategy most Americans can agree on, right?

From Talking Points Memo:

The [PPP] poll also found that a plurality of voters (48%) now say the Republican party is “extremist,” while 40% say the party is mainstream. The numbers were almost flipped on the Democratic side, with 46% viewing the party as mainstream, and 39% viewing it as extremist.

Further, in a generic ballot question, Democrats came out on top 46%-41%. That’s a sharp reversal from last year when, in the days before the midterm elections, Republicans held up to double-digit leads in generic ballot tests.

Shit. The whole “appeal to the most lunatic fringe of your base” thing appears to have convinced almost half of America that the Republicans themselves are also lunatics. Why would anyone make that connection? It’s just a game!

Just look how much fun the “elite media” are having asking rhetorical questions about whether Donald Trump is serious or just playing Ignatius with a bit of cynical Murdoch-style pandering and manipulation. Come on, America, even the lamestream media can figure out that your neighborhood cartoon GOP troll is just out there spewing psychobabble to win over the Stupids. Play along.

And yet, maybe somewhere along the way the peaceful dream of doing absolutely nothing on your domestic policy list that you say you will besides lowering taxes (everybody loves that!) stopped working out so well for the GOP, and America started to kind of realize the Republicans were actually going to be serious this time about trying to dismantle every public social support system ever created.

Who could have imagined that might backfire?

Planned Parenthood’s Facebook fans surged 992 percent after the House approved the budget amendment to defund the group in mid-February. More than 810,000 supporters signed its petition denouncing the amendment — more than half of them new users who had never been active with Planned Parenthood prior to the budget debate. The social media activity also drove Planned Parenthood’s surge in online donations.

Double shit! Of course, even people who tacitly support a cause come to its defense when it is existentially threatened.

We can only hope the GOP continues its self-destructive death march “in the name of angry overtaxed Jesus” to try to destroy unions, Medicare, Medicaid, unemployment benefits, Planned Parenthood, food stamps, and the environment. Then perhaps the millions of middle-class and struggling Americans who were “tacitly supporting” their own existence will recognize the threat to their own human dignity and economic security now that – hey, math – another $127-a-year tax cut is not going to make up the difference on the $127-per-month rise in health care premiums.

Bachmann woos Iowa with her 17th-century vision for society

12 Apr

Why pick on poor LensCrafters? What about Kay Jewelers? Or Wendy’s Drive-Thru? Did LensCrafters “forget” to donate to Bachmann’s re-election campaign?

From Politico:

In a barn-burning speech to social conservatives here, Michele Bachmann called Monday for abolishing the entire tax code and the Department of Education, labeled Planned Parenthood the “LensCrafters of big abortion” and slammed same-sex marriage advocates for going against what she called 5,000 years of human history.

This poor reporter, Kasie Hunt, basically had to just cram every insane thing Bachmann said into a vague article about her ranting in order to keep it under the assigned word limit. Michele also went on to call for the abolishing of the Department of Energy, the Department of Commerce and said district courts are too busy making “decisions,” and they should knock that off.

Bachmann continues to romance Iowa conservatives by calling for the return of candlelit log homes full of illiterate, unwanted children using their guns to fend off the intruders, whom they can no longer bring to “courts” because courts suck and the people called “judges” apparently are, verbatim, “black-robed masters” because they are ninjas and why should they have all the fun. It’s almost like these people would enjoy being Amish ninjas with poor eyesight.

While the myopic Amish ninja contingent is unlikely to win Michele much support in the rest of the contact-lens-wearing-electricity-guzzling-drive-thru-strip-mall-abortion-loving country, we do enjoy her colorful, gothic 17th-century vision for society.

Haikus for John Boehner on the occasion of our government shutdown

8 Apr
Unless you are dead or willfully ignorant, you are aware that the federal government will probably shut down in, like, the next five minutes. Why? Because a bunch of fringe radical Taliban-wannabes have “double-terror hijacked” the negotiations with all the gusto of a band of demon zombie pedophile priests flying out of hell straight into a 5-year-old’s birthday party. What? That’s right, the GOP is so hell-bent on defunding Planned Parenthood, they’re willing to shut down the entire government, the federal parks, the space program and send home 800,000 people from work without pay just to prevent low-income women from getting cancer screenings.

So to celebrate this spectacular new achievement in American Hatefulness, I made haikus.

Do I have cancer
Cancer in summertime
Jesus would not care

Falling to the ground
Dicks raining down on us
Showers from Congress

Angry white teeth gnash
May I have tea with my blood
A lefty slut screams

Where is Batman now
Or really anybody
To bitch slap these dongs

GOP war-death machine pleased to formally declare war on women’s health

18 Feb

Well, the House of Representatives formally declared war on women’s health by a vote of 240-185. We hadn’t declared war in such a long time, the House representatives who voted for the bill said, it felt really good!

Irrelevant person Fred Thompson has something to say about it on the Twitter.

Except, whoops:

Defunding Planned Parenthood will cost taxpayers more money, since every $1 spent on family planning saves the government $4 the next year in Medicare costs. I’m not sure what lives he thinks will be saved, since taking away access to millions of breast and cervical cancer screenings is more likely to kill people than save them. I’m going to give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he can’t possibly imagine women will cease obtaining abortions just because they can’t get cancer screenings, since abortions are the one thing that the federal government money going to Planned Parenthood actually does not fund.

So in the true sense of GOP “victory for America,” this does exactly what they like to do: spend more taxpayer money killing more people, just like wars are supposed to.

That’s GOP math for you, ladies. It’s math similar to you “We kill you = you are free now” and “No government health care because death panels = insurance death panels tell you to go fuck off and die.”

Tell your friends!